Saturday, 30 April 2011

My Royal Wedding Rant

Not everyone is fortunate enough to be born into a life of inherited privilege. Indeed, not everyone is able to bring an entire nation to grinding halt for their wedding day. For the royal family however it comes as second nature. Still, I suppose we should be grateful to our overlords for granting their subjects the day off for such an occasion.

Now don't get me wrong. I have nothing against two people in love getting married. What I do protest to is the grand spectacle and principles the whole farce represents. What the royal wedding amounted to was nothing more than one big PR stunt by the house of Windsor, or propaganda if you will.

In order to make sure that events progressed smoothly, the police were granted special powers to ban any major protests along the procession route. After all, we can't have one of these pompous twits' illusion of grandeur shattered, can we? Only sycophants were allowed to line the route, further inflating the self-importance of these inbreds. In something you would expect in only somewhere like authoritarian China, Scotland Yard warned that anyone attempting to 'disrupt' the royal wedding would face a "robust" response. At an expense costing the taxpayer tens-of-millions, security was ramped up as 5,000 police officers were drafted to enforce the 'safety' of our unelected despots.

Like the movie, Minority Report, police cracked down on potential protesters in the days leading up to the sickening display of pageantry. Six anarchists were arrested by the thought-police three days before the wedding for "planning" protests, or rather for "planning" to exercise their democratic right before they'd even done so. One known anarchist activist, Charlie Veitch, was arrested the day before in a disgusting display of abuse of power and political arrests. Fortunately he filmed it all. He was held for eight-hours in an undisclosed police cell as his partner, friends, family and lawyer were obstructed from contacting him or even knowing where he was being held. What's even more telling is a statement made by police commander Christine Jones, who stated that "any criminals attempting to disrupt it, be that in the guise of protest or otherwise, will be met by a robust, decisive, flexible and proportionate policing". It's difficult to claim we live in a free country when political activists are labelled as "criminals" and jailed.

So here, in a supposed democracy where free speech is allegedly highly valued, we have the enforcing arm of the establishment silencing genuine dissidents. And, thanks to them, this brazen public spectacle of propaganda, stupidity and social hierarchy passed without event. It's actually quite disturbing to watch the sycophantic, downtrodden masses cheering their 'superiors' in a scene like something out the Middle-Ages. And one of the most ironically amusing facts about the event? The royal family invited 'royal' Middle-Eastern families from countries currently involved in violently oppressing revolutions back home.

My main contention with the idea of a monarchy however is this. People should be inspired to believe they can achieve anything they want to, and society should encourage that sense of aspiration. However, when you have a monarchy it quashes this idea, embodying a spirit of deference and dependence on others. Monarchy robs of aspiration, essentially telling us that even the most talented 'commoner' is no match for the most foul royal. The monarchy crushes the spirit of democracy and meritocracy therein only to justify its own existence. It embodies the very worst of nepotism, corruption and abuse of privilege insofar that we are essentially telling our children that they will never be good enough to be head of state.

Occupying the lavish palaces across the country we have a family of fairy ordinary, uninspiring individuals who represent the very worst of British - even humanity. They are snobbish, elitist and horribly out of touch with the modern world. Despite doing little, and achieving even less, they demand respect and deference from everyone. Scientists, academics and other professionals holding doctorates and professorships are lectured and patronised by the likes of Prince Charles, who demands he be heard and taken seriously for no other reason than his rank. Only look to his ongoing involvement in the climate change movement and how still, after the Climate Gate scandal at UEA a couple of years ago, he remains 100% committed to a theory riddled with holes. And it will partly be this undeserved, unmerited clout which he commands which will stop dead any serious academic scrutiny which the topic needs.

But let us not be too harsh on these parasites. They are dysfunctional and eccentric because of the bizarre institution into which they have been born. From birth they are surrounded by sycophants and lackeys whose deferential mindsets teach them they can get away with all manner of self-indulgent and extravagant behaviour that pleases them. It's hardly surprising then that Charles believes he has all the answers to the World's problems if he's always been told how brilliant he was, regardless of his own academic record. Indeed, the monarchy is as damaging to itself as they are to everybody else.

They are useless. They serve no function, and yet we are expected to love them, be deferential to them, and thank them when they grant us some free time. This wedding essentially portrayed a desperate attempt by the Windors to defend their privilege. They employ a huge PR team who work around the clock to promote the royal brand. Unable to point to any meaningful purpose, the Windsors claim simply to "work hard" without being able to point at anything to suggest this is true. They repeatedly remind us what they do for charity, but even this is of questionable value. After all, could not one do charity work without all the royal titles and hundreds of servants?

In a democracy it is important for protests to be heard. In this case it is important for the world to hear that "you are not a prince, I am not your subject". You would be surprised how many hundreds-of-million world-wide would agree with how ridiculous and stupid this whole thing was, and more importantly, take comfort in the fact that they are not alone.